Mylittlebook.org

This is a multi-part article. Please start from the Introduction.

This has been a journey of many parts with David and Solomon and I hope you have enjoyed the ride. 

We have seen how the advice of a father impacted an entire nation and the world. It brought stability, fame and wealth to the kingdom like never before, or ever since. 

Lessons Learned

In terms of leaving a lasting legacy for our children, David showed us that it is not only about what you leave FOR them but rather what you leave IN them.

He taught us to:

• Start when they are young and tender
• Teach them God’s ways
• Link our advice to their purpose
• Emphasise the benefits of accepting our advice.

Another important lesson from David and Solomons’ relationship is that, in order for the above to be successful, our children must respect us and hold us in high esteem. Solomon must have valued his fathers’ counsel otherwise David could not have influenced him from the grave.

You can do likewise by:

• being a godly person
• keeping your word
• making time for them
• being a person of integrity
• being loving and faithful to their mother

A final lesson learned

God gives more than you ask for … if you ask with the right heart.

You see, obedience has its rewards. Solomon obeyed his father and asked for wisdom and knowledge … and so God gave him more.

God said to Solomon “Since this is your heart’s desire and you have not asked for wealth, riches or honour, nor for the death of your enemies, and since you have not asked for a long life but for wisdom and knowledge to govern my people over whom I have made you king, therefore wisdom and knowledge will be given to you. And I will also give you wealth, riches and honour, such as no king who was before you ever had and none after you will have.

Our God is a God of abundance and He looks to the condition of our hearts whenever we ask for something. This is something you must impart to your children as you teach them to desire more of God.

You and your children

Most of us are a sum total of the values and habits picked up from our parents and things learnt in our youth. It’s therefore important that, as parents, we examine our relationship with our children and ask tough questions, like:

• Am I the most significant influence in their lives? If not, what or who is?
• Do I know the purpose of each of my children?
• Is God and His Word important to them … and me?
• Am I giving them advice that will play a major part in their future decision making process? 
• What values am I passing on to my children? Integrity, faithfulness, love for others despite differences, etc?

These questions can only be answered if we spent QUANTITY and QUALITY time with our children and are available to clarify any issues that arise. 

Teaching them about God and leaving a godly legacy is your responsibility … you cannot outsource this to the Church. You must prepare them for when they leave the ‘nest’ or when you go to be with the Lord. 

Start doing it and God will give you all the grace and favour needed to influence and shape their lives for good.

I leave you with this video.

Think … and be blessed

This is a multi-part article. Please start from the Introduction.

“Understanding will exalt you … honour you … set a garland of grace on your head and present you with a crown of splendour”. Proverbs 4:8-9

 What do good mentors do to motivate their mentees? 

They encourage them to stick to the task, focus on being successful AND envision the possible rewards when success is achieved.

David was a great counsellor, coach and teacher because knew how to emphasise the benefits of following his teaching. In  addition to protection and guidance, he highlighted two things that were essential to Solomons’ purpose as a king.

Grace:

Elegance or beauty of form; a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment.

David knew that for the kingdom to have longevity, influence and stability, Solomon needed to have grace and style.

He saw God’s wisdom as the key … a fact proven when the queen of Sheba came to visit Solomon. The Bible says that when she saw how wisdom and understanding had helped Solomon excel (e.g. build a palace and organise his affairs), she was overwhelmed and praised God.

Because of his fathers’ legacy, Solomon became a sought after king and counsellor. His wisdom and understanding of many things honoured and exalted him and presented him with a garland of grace.

Splendour

A brilliant or gorgeous appearance; magnificence; an instance or display of imposing pomp or grandeur:

The British Royal family come to mind when I think of splendour. Take a look at this.

If there is one thing Solomon’s reign was noted for it was splendour … his splendour was the stuff of legends and was so great that even Jesus Christ, used Solomon as the benchmark for splendour in Matthew 6:29.

For example:

• King Solomon was greater in riches and wisdom than all the other kings of the earth.
• He made silver as common in Jerusalem as stones … hence silver was considered of little value in Solomon’s days.
• He had fourteen hundred chariots and twelve thousand horses.

David’s prophecy about wisdom and understanding presenting Solomon with a crown of splendour came to pass. 

You and your children

 What about you?

What are you trying to teach your children? Is it an uphill struggle to get them to do or apply certain things in their lives?

Sometimes it’s because they do not have the knowledge, experience and foresight you have … hence they rebel and make suboptimal decisions.

Maybe you ought to adopt David’s approach and emphasise the benefits.

Your challenge is to use Gods’ timeless principles and make your counsel relevant and in tune with their future aspirations. Once they see your advice can add value to their lives, they will follow it and be blessed.

Guess what? … we have hit the end of the road. It’s now time to wrap up in the conclusion.

This is a multi-part article. Please start from the Introduction.

… she will protect you; … she will watch over you. Proverbs 4:6 

David did not just tell Solomon to ask for wisdom and understanding … he told him WHY?

That’s what good ‘teachers’ do and David did just that because he linked his counsel (seeking wisdom and understanding) to the critical things (protection and guidance) he knew Solomon would need as king (his purpose).

Why Wisdom?

Wisdom is knowledge of what is true or right coupled with just judgment as to action.

David realized Solomon would be vulnerable, after he died, unless Solomon could have the people on his side. He knew that making wise and just decisions was the key to public support … a fact proven when Solomon faced one of his early tests as a young king.

In this case, 2 prostitutes had each given birth to a son but one died and both were claiming the one who had survived childbirth. Unable to resolve this issue, they brought the case before the young king who used God’s wisdom to determine the true mother of the living baby.

The Bible says in 1 Kings 3:28 ‘Now when all Israel heard the verdict the king had given, they held the king in awe, because they saw that he had wisdom from God to administer justice’.

This same wisdom enabled Solomon to keep Israel peaceful and form strategic alliance with other royalty.

Why Understanding?

Understanding is having superior power of discernment or skill in dealing with or handling something.

Leadership is all about people and David knew Solomon needed to have enlightened intelligence in order to guide and lead his people sucessfully.

Solomons’ exceptional  understanding of the issues of life made him Israels’ teacher and a leader amongst all the nations of the world.

 You and your children.

Getting wisdom and understanding, the legacy David left Solomon, protected him, watched over him and gave Solomons’ kingship a legitimacy he could not have bought with all the money he had.

This happened because David explained the ‘why’ and crucially, linked it to Solomons’ future.

You will also have to answer the ‘why’ when your children ask you questions like: ‘why must I serve God’?;  ‘why must I study’? etc.

You have to be able to ‘connect the dots’ and the dots must lead to the future.  Why? Because when there is a lack of knowledge, people make wrong or poor choices.

Do you know your childrens’ purpose? Can you link your advice to the critical things your children need to fulfil purpose?.

If your answer is ‘No’ to the above, then you need to ask God to:

1. Reveal their purpose to you.  God has done this several times and believe that He will do the same for you because YOU are meant to lay a right foundation for your children.
2. Give you the wisdom to raise them up and to identify the critical things they need to fulfil purpose.

Once you have done this, the next step is to ‘Emphasise the benefits’ and … that’s what Lesson 4 is all about.

This is a multi-part article. Please start from the Introduction.

He taught me and said ‘get wisdom, get understanding’ … Proverbs 4:4

Remember your school days? All the time spent learning the alphabet, maths and memorising poems.

Did you get it right first time? Most probably not.  To ensure you were taught properly, your school required that you spent a certain number of hours being instructed and also gave you homework everyday. 

Why? Because teaching is the process by which knowledge or skill is imparted … and it requires TIME.

The same applies when you are trying to teach life’s lessons to your children … you need to make the time.

Why is making time important?

These numbers hold the clue

What do these numbers mean to you?

1. 8760
2. 2080
3. 156

 These numbers represent the number of hours:

1. You have each year
2. Spent at work each year (for a 40 hour week) 
3. Spent in Church each year (if you or your children are in ‘Church’ for 3 hours every week)

Implication:

• You and your children most likely spend more time outside Church than you do in Church.
• When it comes to the things of God, don’t leave it to ‘the Church’ to educate your child. 2 or even 4 hours a week is just not enough.
• If you, as a parent do not teach them yourself, you will be short changing them  – they spend more time outside Church and will learn more from the ‘world’.
• ‘Church’ must a lifestyle … an everyday thing.

Lessons from what David Did.

• He made a lot of time for his young son.
• He consulted God and got to know what Solomon’s purpose was.
• He made sure that in their pupil-teacher relationship, a lot of things were explained, clarified and reinforced. 
• He  made sure Solomon had the tools needed to be successful as a king. 
• He FOCUSSED on a FEW THINGS to teach his son and made sure Solomon desired them and knew their importance.
• He repeatedly emphasised wisdom and understanding because he knew being a king was all about leading people and making wise choices.
• He made sure Solomon knew God was the source of those things.

You and your children

The Bible says you MUST train your children and teach them the choose the right path, so that when they are old they will remain on it.

To train means to:

• Develop or form the habits, thoughts, or behavior of (a child or other person) by discipline and instruction
• Make proficient by instruction and practice

Because children pick up so many things from their peers, the media and society, you need to be there if you want to train them successfully.

You need to be around to hear their conversations, listen to their thoughts, watch their reaction to events and correct things that are not in line with Gods principles … this cannot be outsourced to a Sunday School teacher.  

Your aim is to train them to be people of Godly character and to keep their word; to let them envision future successes and believe that all things are possible with God.

You cannot teach everything so you must be FOCUSSED, determine the KEY things they need for a Godly life and help them build a strong FOUNDATION.

You effectively become their coach, counsellor, friend, ‘enemy’, mentor and encourager.

No kidding, it’s a tall order and time consuming … BUT, it’s a price worth paying.

To be successful in all of this, you must ‘Link your advice to their purpose’ … and that’s what Lesson 3 is all about? 

This is a multi-part article. Please start from the Introduction.

When I was a boy in my father’s house, still tender, and an only child of my mother he taught me and said … Proverbs 4:3

David did not wait until Solomon was ‘old enough’ to decide for themselves … as is the fashion in some quarters these days. 

Are your children still young and tender? If not sure, here are some definitions: 

Young:

• being in the first or early stage of life or growth
• undeveloped
• inexperienced

Tender:

• immature
• yielding readily to force or pressure

Why young and tender?

Because children can be moulded and shaped and are more likely to heed parental counsel.  They are a ‘blank slate’ and are affected by what they are exposed to.

Most parents make the mistake of thinking their children are not being influenced, simply because they cannot always express it verbally. That’s wrong because the media (e.g. Children’s programmes and advertisements) are all having an effect on your children from the age of 1. 

Studies have shown that at 7 years of age the brain of a child is approximately 95 percent of its adult size … advertisers and other people are aware of this.  

You and your children

If you allow your children to be ‘educated’ by television and other forms of media, within a short time they will be able to mention names of politicians, advertised products, pick up a number of bad habits and not know anything about God.

You need to start teaching them Godly principles when they are young and tender because what they learn depends on what they are exposed too.

David chose to expose Solomon to the things of God at an early age … what about you?

Lesson 2 deals with what you need to teach them.

Read and be blessed

This is you:

• You are the son of an adulteress and the man who married her after ’murdering’ her first husband.
• You are not the next in line to the throne and have an older brother who earlier had declared himself king.
• You are now  king but only because your revered father, on his death bed, mandated it.
• Your father is dead.
• You have a lot of powerful enemies.
• You are not yet 20 years old.

God comes to you and says, “ask for whatever you want me to give you” .

What would YOU ask for?

This is Solomon:

Solomon was all of the above and God asked him the same question in 2 Chronicles 1:7 “Ask for whatever you want me to give you.”

Solomon answered, “You have shown great kindness to David my father and made me king in his place.  Now, Lord God, let your promise to my father David be confirmed, for you have made me king over a people who are as numerous as the dust of the earth. 

Give me wisdom and knowledge, that I may lead this people, for who is able to govern this great people of yours?”

Why Wisdom?

I never quite understood why Solomon asked for wisdom … even God expected him to ask for other things. 

As I pondered on why a young man had the maturity and wisdom to ask for wisdom, God revealed to me that Solomon asked for wisdom because of Davids’ wise and godly counsel. It’s all in a book written by Solomon.

David and Solomon

It’s something often missed but Proverbs 4:4–9 is advice from David to his son Solomon. In Proverbs 4:3 Solomon says “When I was a boy in my father’s house he taught me and said”… and this is what David said;

“Lay hold of my words with all your heart;  keep my commands and you will live.

Get wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or swerve from them. 

Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. 

Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. 

Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Esteem her, and she will exalt you; embrace her, and she will honor you. 

She will set a garland of grace on your head and present you with a crown of splendor.”

This is what David taught his youngest son and this is why Solomon asked for wisdom and understanding. 

David emphasised the importance of wisdom on so many occasions that he was able to influence Solomon even after he died. He made sure his young son had the right foundation and as we shall see later, this helped establish Solomon as king.

You and Your Children

Now, how about you? Are you giving your children a strong foundation?

What are you teaching your children? Are they being brought up to esteem and desire certain things? Are these things of God?

If God was to say to your children “ask for whatever you want me to give you”  … what will they say?

If you are not sure, you may want to ask them. 

You see, the question is not IF we influence them but HOW we influence them.

If you want to have a lasting and positive influence on your children, there are lessons to be learnt from the relationship between David and Solomon. 

Why don’t you take a look at Lesson 1 and be blessed.